Baking

I just put some delicious banana bread in the oven and I'm waiting for it to finish. Sometimes when I'm really stressed, down or anxious I get on a baking kick. Mixing the ingredients occupies my thoughts and I just feel more at home making something delicious in the kitchen. I love the smell that fills my house and taking a nice big bite into something warm and yummy afterwards. I've been thinking the last few days. Sometimes life just doesn't go the way you have planned. I've always been a planner and I hate readjusting and most of all change. One thing I've had to learn is that sometimes my plan isn't actually the best one. Heavenly father knows what's best for me and my loved ones. 2012 was my hardest year yet. I learned that the only person I can really ever trust for sure is my heavenly father. You just never know for sure. Of course, that's not a good way to live. We all need to be trusting and give the benefit of the doubt as much as we can. The message I got from this is that through the church is the only way to sure happiness, security, peace, etc. We have to do what heavenly father wants, even if it's hard. We have to live the way he would want us to. And if we don't he will bring us down to humility until we've hit rock bottom so that we have to turn things around. All we have to do is humble ourselves and turn to him and we are filled with peace and love and our burdens are lifted. I have been through this personally and seen many other loved ones go through this experience. How many blessings do we miss during this charade? How much damage is done? That is the sad part. I am so grateful to my heavenly father for my trial last year. It was the saddest time in my life but I was able to strengthen my relationship with him and also learn many lessons from it. I will never forget how loving and supportive my parents were during those crazy months and how they were there to help me through it. My sweet dad has never done anything wrong in his life and he is so patient as his heart aches from the choices his daughters make. He is such an example to me of patience and long suffering. I know that my sister is appreciating this now, even though she must go through her trial on her own, my parent's are doing what they can. I pray that she will turn things around and make use of this trial and learn all she can from it and change her life. I know that heavenly father is with her and giving her comfort. I pray that she will hold on to that for the rest of her life as I am trying to. I know things will work out according to our heavenly father's will, I just hope that she uses her agency to make this a good turning point.
Everyday is a battle for me. It's easy to get distracted by the day to day things. But I have been trying to read my scriptures and pray each day so that I can remember what's important and have the spirit with me.